One title of my personal Patron god translates roughly as "Opener of the Way."

That's all you get this time around. I try like blazes not to mention Names.

Anyway, like a great many things in religion, the title has multiple meanings on multiple levels. Despite temptation and my low and base nature, I'm not going to dwell on the obvious sexual one. Sometimes it's amazingly fun to be the priest.

This is the Guy who knows where the best fishing spot is. This is the Guy who knows the glade where the deer are calm enough to get within an arm's length. This is the Guy who knows the secret spot where the sun peeks out first.

In the city, this is the Guy who knows how to get there faster. This is the Guy who can find the one working payphone in a ten block range. This is the Guy who can be there and gone before you knew you needed to go.

Sounds pretty sweet right? Just the Guy you needed to know, right?

Here's what I haven't told you. Yet.

That fishing spot? Sure it's the best around and the fish always bite. But to get to it, you have to crawl about a hundred feet along a cliff face high over a canyon with your finger and toe tips. There's no place to hold your fishing rod except your teeth.

To reach that glade, you have to pass a Buick sized wasp nest and a cave that has been hosting some sort of large carnivore recently.

That secret spot where the sun peeks out is at the top of an old pine tree with uncertain footing. Some of the branches crack when you put weight on them.

Sure the Guy knows the best ways to get there, but you take your life in your hands every time you follow his directions.

That shortcut in the city means going up a fire escape and through five locked utility doors, at least one of which may be wired to an alarm.

And that pay phone works because it has defenders who will want to be paid. Assuming they let you get close in the first place.

An interesting Guy, to say the least. Master of wildernesses urban and natural, he can Open the Way. If you are willing to pay the Price.

He's not the portal, nor is he the Warden. His job isn't to keep the nasties out, it's to Find a Way Through.

That's what makes his esoteric instructions a bit risky. Strike that. Not a bit risky, highly risky.

His intervention is always chancy. Which I suppose is only fitting, since the Guy will tell you at great length that he invented games of chance and gambling.

He doesn't exactly break the rules, the Guy replaces the rules with ones He wrote. And yes, the Guy gets off on the excitement. He grooves on the risk, laughing all the way.

He's my Patron and I honor Him. But you better believe I think twice before asking for His help.