Listen and consider
Tuesday, 23Dec2014 Filed in: modern adult pagans
I’m one of those history nerds. The really strange kind. When I started studying history seriously, I didn’t like the names and dates. I wanted to understand the why.
One basic idea that I use is the aunts & grandmothers theory. This one is important so you should probably pay attention. No matter what the title, no matter what the official hierarchy, any competent leader is going to seek out and listen to the voice of experience who still cares deeply but doesn’t necessarily agree with the leader. “The men may sit in council but the aunts and the grandmothers shape lives.”
Measure a society by how well it listens to the folks not in the direct chain of command.
Aunts and grandmothers is a colorful way of putting it, but try finding a good organization that doesn’t do the same thing. The military officer who doesn’t listen to his noncoms doesn’t last long. The executive who doesn’t listen to the office and maintenance staff soon finds himself pushed out. And yes, the new parents who do not talk to the aunts and grandmothers can really screw up a kid’s life.
We’re human, we don’t have all the answers. Our family (or “family’) has some, our neighbors have some, and some we come up with when we’re arguing with people we respect. That’s where our wisdom comes from. That’s where our wisdom is tested. And that is where our wisdom is passed on.
That’s the key, respect. Even when we disagree, we have to keep respect.
Or we’re just shouting insults.
One basic idea that I use is the aunts & grandmothers theory. This one is important so you should probably pay attention. No matter what the title, no matter what the official hierarchy, any competent leader is going to seek out and listen to the voice of experience who still cares deeply but doesn’t necessarily agree with the leader. “The men may sit in council but the aunts and the grandmothers shape lives.”
Measure a society by how well it listens to the folks not in the direct chain of command.
Aunts and grandmothers is a colorful way of putting it, but try finding a good organization that doesn’t do the same thing. The military officer who doesn’t listen to his noncoms doesn’t last long. The executive who doesn’t listen to the office and maintenance staff soon finds himself pushed out. And yes, the new parents who do not talk to the aunts and grandmothers can really screw up a kid’s life.
We’re human, we don’t have all the answers. Our family (or “family’) has some, our neighbors have some, and some we come up with when we’re arguing with people we respect. That’s where our wisdom comes from. That’s where our wisdom is tested. And that is where our wisdom is passed on.
That’s the key, respect. Even when we disagree, we have to keep respect.
Or we’re just shouting insults.
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